Waiting For Change

You know how when you were in elementary school, you did everything your parents told you to, all your schoolwork without thinking about it? Without asking why? Well, those answers seem obvious now, the ultimate goal at this point is getting into a good college and all that crap. But back then, I remember the first time I questioned the whole process of waking up and following orders. It was dull, preprogrammed meaninglessness. What's the point of all this? What's there to gain? How am I supposed to exercise my free will if I didn't even know what I wanted in the first place? That's when I realized how bored I was.

As a side anecdote, there's something very unique about the way we react at Rickards. I know other schools have the impression that it's sketchy or shady but... Last week, I was in Spanish class when a loud BOOM sounded. Anyone else would have assumed it to be a gunshot and panicked. But no, most of the students didn't even flinch for a second. It's too normal now. But it's not because we wouldn't be afraid of something like that, it's because the chemistry class has that dry ice lab every year.

Actually, I don't think it was the dry ice because we already had that lab last semester. Point is, when I heard the noise, I secretly wished it was something to panic about. That everyone would freak and it would be Cloverfield or something equally exciting and apocalyptic. It would be an interesting change, it would somehow make me feel alive. This perverse attraction to conflict is probably due to my needy personality unable to stay in the same place for a long time, or at least a desire to perpetually have something to look forward to.

So why do I say all of this? Because I'm procrastinating for my Theater IA.